Captain Kippah Giveaway!

Have you ever just had one of those days? Well im have one of those few weeks, i think everyone is right now. First Rozie got strep that lasted a week, then Dovie got the strangest virus that also lasted a week, and then my Mel came home from Yeshiva with what felt like his 100th sinus infection this winter, and said he couldn't take it anymore ( poor guy). Needless to say Ive been doing a lot of back rubbing, and running between bedrooms at the sound of little whimpers. Things have been a little out of sorts we even lost Dovie's shoes. How does one lose a pair of shoes? And to top it all off we are doing renovations upstairs. It has been one of those weeks, but things are winding down. Mel is on some STRONG antibiotics, and Dovie and Rozie are feeling much better. This morning i heard a loud "It's a Chanukah Miracle.... I found my shoes"!!!!
See all is good again.

I thought the best way to come back after such a interesting few weeks would be with a Giveaway, because free stuff can make anyone feel better, right?
I have a wonderful new sponsor Captain Kippah. They sell the cutest Kippas with rhinestones, sequins, and even firetrucks. You have to check them out. Dovie was so excited to get his.

He was sold with the shiny Dalet, but was super excited about the "D".

He just started learning some of his English letters this year and wanted to show off that he now knows his name starts with Dalet and the letter D.


Captain Kippah also wants to giveaway a free Kippah to a MyShtub reader. Perfect for Pesach.
All you have to do to enter is...
1. Check out their website and comment here what is your favorite item
2. Like Captain Kippah on Facebook here
3. Share this giveaway on your wall
3. Also make sure to like MyShtub on Facebook here, for an extra entry.
Leave a separate comment for each item you do.
A winner will be chosen this Tuesday March 6th, Good Luck!

Home Work

Before Rozie was born i worked outside of the home. I taught art in schools when my Mel was little, and i taught preschool when Dovie was a baby. I loved my job as a preschool teacher and planned to come back as after i had her, but her surprise diagnosis changed a few of our plans.

 After seeing how much she was going to need medically, physically, and emotionally, my husband and i decided i should quit working. I know i should of been a little more sad about this because i loved my job , but honestly i love being home with my kinderlach more then any job Ive had in the past, but that doesn't mean its easier.
 
It is very hard to stay motivated when you are in your own home and your not receiving a paycheck. When Rozie was about 18months i decided to take a speech therapy course for parents, so i could work with her more. I highly recommend this course it is worth the 6 weeks trust me it was life changing for Rozie's speech progress here is a link.
 
I go to all her therapy appointments and take her to two mommy and me classes a week. This is all easy for me its scheduled and someone is expecting me to show up, but in our downtime i notice my motivation starts to lack.
 
When we are at home and have a few hours in between nap time, therapy appointments, and snacks i have a tendency to give her free play and i get some of my computer work done ( ok see i work a little from home now). I usually feel guilty about this free play and get upset with myself for this missed fine motor, speech, and gross motor opportunities, but then the educator in me says free play is also important.
 
I needed a solution and here is what i came up with. When Rozie has had a very full day i try to allow more free play and give her a break. When she has a lighter day i try to do more instructional play. When she is in free play mode i try to sit on the floor of the play room and let her lead.
 
When it is instructional time i pull out some toy suggestions and work on some skills. In the end i decided just being there more is the ultimate answer. Spending less time away from my Ipad, Iphone, laptop, computer, and just hanging out with girl, but this is also not always the answer.
 
I have online work i need to do, pictures to edit, and blog posts to write, so here is my solution part two. If i have a jammed day then i encourage myself to give her at least one hour of one and one time, and it doesn't matter if it is free play instructional play or a little bit of both, and this has been working for me.
What about my other kids?

Well Dovie is in school from 9am -2:30 so when i speak about my day with Rozie it is really in that time frame, because when both are home i need to give them my 100% or disasters start to happen. LOL

Needless to say when my head hits the pillow at night i am out, but trust me i have a smile on my face.
I love you my sweet little kinder to the moon and back a million billion trillion times over.
---------------------------------------------------------
Make sure to check out my newest sponsors on the right of this post, and our new social media buttons. Come like us on Facebook and keep up with all going on in MyShtub.
If you would like to become a MyShtub sponsor/advertiser please contact me at myshtub@gmail.com and read here for more info.

These are a few of my favorite kids.....

Its still early and hopefully all the Shabbos cooking will get done, and since we are going out for lunch, whooo hoooo i have time to share some of my  favorite things from this week....
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Big brothers who play dolls with their little sister who had strep all week. Just becasue he wanted her to feel better.

 Now that is a mitzvah note times a hundred!

 Snack time with peanut butter all over the face, and no matter how many times you wash that face, and little hands, the faint smell of peanut butter lasts the entire day. I dreamt that night of chubby baby hands and peanut butter cups, two very edible things, lol

 Little boys that need a haircut so badly that he is starting to look like a Jewish Justin Bieber, baby baby baby ( that is the only Bieber song i know)

 and our sticker wall is really filling up. I have one small wall i allow sticker sticking, that way they are not on my windows, other walls, car windows, my shoes, my mirrors, and hopefully not stuck to the back of my skirt all day.
Have a wonderful Shabbos!

Water and Marks

So recently i had some images of Rozie stolen from me. Someone copy and pasted her picture onto a social networking site, creating a "Rozie" community. They took one of her pictures cropped out the watermark and created their own watermark. Needless to say i panicked. I found out about it a few minutes before Shabbos and screamed to my husband to help me to get that picture of that site NOW!!! He did.

It ruined my entire Shabbos and i couldn't stop thinking about what horrible things these people were doing with my sweet Rozie's picture. The site was not in English and i couldn't understand why they wanted her picture and a few of her friends' pictures who are also little blond girls with Down syndrome. In the end it wasn't so bad they were using the pics for educational reasons, and i was told in these countries copy-write laws are not as strict as ours.

It was strange that i was so shocked. I kind of knew it would happen someday, i guess i just hoped it wouldn't. I made the choice to put my kids pictures up on the World Wide Web, a hard choice to make. I thought about shutting the blog down i thought about from now on only posting pictures of my kids feet, you know i love those, but in the end i decided to keep doing what i have already been doing. Yes I'm still at risk but i just couldn't stop posting and sharing with all of you. The good i feel like I'm doing here in my little shtub out ways all the risks, i think and hope. When i introduced Rozie and my three kids to all of you, it was the first time for some of you that you saw Down syndrome in a different way, in a beautiful way.

( dont you love the Ms.Thang personality)
That to me is worth the world, but is it worth her picture being used in a way that would make any parent panic? I don't know im at such a crossroads. This blog just wouldn't be the same without their shinning faces.
What do you guys think?
For now Ive decided to take some steps to ensure my photos are a bit safer. Nothing is perfect and anyone can steal any pic they want no matter what you do, but people want the easy way so im making it harder hoping to deter.

Im using a much more invasive watermark as you can see, closer to my kids faces making it harder to crop out. I also plan to hire a designer to make me a better more complicated watermark. So watch for the changes. My husband is doing some behind the scenes stuff to boost my security also, again nothing is 100% but hopefully better then what i had.
If you guys have any suggestions, or tips i would love to hear them.

( this is what Rozie looks like when you tell her to smile, lol)

Basement dust rebels

There has been a baby boom recently in my little town. I think all my friends are either pregnant or they just had a baby. I love seeing first times moms sporting their new bellies, and the experienced ones having their 4th or 5th child like its nothing. There is a constant refresh in a community when babies are always being born. There is always a new face to liven things up.

For the mother without little ones in tow, this liveliness, this communal refresh can be painful and almost unbearable. I was that mother for a long time. I had my Mel but he was quickly growing up and siblings were not in the near future. There grew a pang of envy, jealously, and sometimes even anger when a baby is all you want and everyone is having one but you. I'm sure many of you can relate and B"H many of you can't. Having children to me was a light source. Being able to have my three little ones was everything i could of asked for, and more.
I'm most likely not going to be able to have more. The hard reality is i can not even attempt to have more children until i am completely done with treatment and for a few more years after that. I will be in my mid 40s. I know, I know many mothers have babies in their forties but most of those mothers do not have a history of infertility, chemo ( chemo kills your eggs), and an extensive medical history.

When i first received my medical diagnosis and the doctor was speaking to me about some pretty scary stuff, i looked up at him and the first thing i said was "will i be able to have more kids." The doctor sort of gave this look like are you seriously talking about having more kids when I'm speaking to you about how long you are going to live, but that is me, a mother first.

When i became very ill and was going through chemo my mother came to live with us for awhile. We were in the basement and she was looking at the room full of baby gear and clothes, and said do you want to start getting rids of some of this stuff? It took everything in me not to propel myself onto the stuff and scream "NEVER". I still hold onto the swing, exersaucer, the newborn clothes, and baby sling like it is my lifeblood. Like if it get rid of this stuff then i have given into the Cancer, i have let it win. So it sits there, and its starting to collect dust, my little dust ridden rebels.

The idea of not having another baby is so overwhelming to me that i can not even think about it, but it happens. Its easy not to stress and worry when you have a little baby in your arms, but my babies are growing. My oldest is taller then i am. My Dovie is maturing and growing into a little boy and losing his toddler "look", and my Rozie..... I will have to say one of the things i love about Down syndrome is our little ones look young for a lot longer. They use a swing longer, they use the high chair longer, and they need the stroller longer. I relish in it. I love her tiny baby hands and tiny baby feet ( she wears and infant 3.5), but no matter what she will mature. She will grow. Lately her toddler personality is taking over. Even though she is still a 3.5 foot she acts like she wears a 9. She still fits nicely in a highchair, but i can no longer use it because she climbs right out. Soon it will go down to the basement to be stored with the dust rebels.
She is no longer a baby and will tell you so. She can tell you how old she is, her name, and if she is wearing a "fancy" bracelet or not. I no longer have a baby in my house. These words are so hard to even write i...I no longer have a baby in my house.
I know Hashem will give me what i need when i need it. Right now getting healthy is what i need to do, and realistically i couldn't imagine what a pregnancy would do to me right now. This time around though it is different. I do not feel pain, anger, or even jealously to my friends, i feel genuine joy for them. I rejoice with them and share in their simchas, im so thankful i can do that. I know this is Hashem's way of telling me its not time for me to have more, but dont worry Hashem im not ready to give up yet.

Photography.. You asked, im answering

Disclaimer: I am not a professional photographer. I love photography and enjoy doing it as a hobby, and sometimes if im lucky get payed to do it. I never took a photography class except for in high school and that was 20 year ago (don't tell anyone). All my tips and tricks are things I've tried and worked for me, someone else may have a better and easier way. Most of my photography education comes from YouTube im embarrassed to say.
These are MyShtub reader questions...
Q. What kind of camera and lens do you use.
I have a Nikon D40 which is the most amateur and easiest to use of the SLR family. I now have a Nikon D90 and oh baby i'm in love. My two favorite lens are my zoom lens 55-200mm and my new 35mm prime lens. Most of my pics i do with the zoom lens, but it is horrible in low light so i have to use a flash that i put my hand over to diffuse the brightness. My new 35mm prime lens is amazing in dim rooms and any other low light situation. So in simple terms i use my zoom lens outside on a nice day and my prime lens inside.
Q.How do you get your great shots, mine always look so posed?
A great shot often surprises me,usually for every great shot i post there was 50 bad ones. I set my camera to allow rapid shutter release and when my kids are playing  i start snapping, and snapping fast. I usually catch them when they look up at me and that is when the money shot happens. I never say look at me guys, say cheese, or smile. All i would get is bad preschooler smiles that usually look more like a growl. A simple trick i learned was to ask your subject to speak about their favorite thing, food or place. It is instinctual to smile when speaking about something we love. Same goes for kids.
It also takes work, getting to their level makes all the difference in the world. It can be embarrassing to lay on the sidewalk at times, but it is worth it.

I was laying in the sand on my stomach to get this shot, so she copied me
Q. I love all your feet shots, what is your obsession?
Trust me I'm not obsessed with feet i just like to document. I want to remember all the little shoes and little hands. These details we forget, so sometime stepping out of the photography box and just photographing the hands or the feet makes the most beautiful picture. Those pics are often my favorite.

Q. I love the color in your pics is it the camera the lens or the post editing?
All of the above. I'm obsessed with light especially that deep heavy sun when it is setting and reflects of everything. I set my camera to adapt to different lighting situations, and i try to never ever use my flash. I learned a lot about that here on this site. After that is all said and done and i have a great shot it is the editing that takes it over the edge causing the picture, in my opinion, to pop.

Q. How do you edit your pics what are your tricks.
I use Photoshop.... I know that stung you wanted me to say i used a simple program anyone can use, but Photoshop and i have a long standing relationship. I learned Photoshop in college and Ive been obsessed ever since. It has been the most useful thing to learn in so many ways. I make my editing simple as possible, because it can consume your time. I usually adjust my curves first that in itself does wonders for a pic.

Then i run an action. An action is a program you purchase to supplement Photoshop with one click it does all the adjustments for you. Then you can adjust individually from there. If you don't know Photoshop this probably sounds like Greek, sorry. I would recommend trying Photoshop elements if you are serious about photography i hear it is an easier simplified Photoshop. If you are serious about photography then i highly recommend a Photoshop class.
Raw

Adjusted Curves

With a Photoshop Action

Q. Do you think photography editing is cheating, any photo can look good if you know your way around a computer?
First of all its a total package. Good camera, Great lens, Amazing shot, Awesome editing. Editing is just part of photography, when i took it 20 years ago in High School all the editing was done in the dark room, burn more here, lighten more here. Now its all done on the computer.


This pics were taken within seconds of each other
Q. Do you really shlep that huge SLR with you everywhere?
Yes and no. It really is big and in the way. I have knocked my kids on the head with it more times then i care to admit, and broke a lens dropping it. I really need to invest in a camera bag, but the thought of carrying around one more bag is mind boggling. So for now i don't have an answer, sometimes when I'm just not in the mood to lug the thing i use my iPhone. It has amazing apps like Instagram that satisfy my photography needs when lugging is not the stars.
Q. Can you recommend a point and shoot that takes great pics.
Honestly i have no idea i really don't know much about photography, but when i was in California my cousin had this great point and shoot, the Canon Power Shot G12 that took amazing close ups and had a tilt-shift setting that was so cool it made everything look like it was in the beginning scenes of Mr.Rodgers neighborhood. Here is a quote from my cousin: "The nice thing is that it shoots in RAW, has auto bracketing, HDRI, and a built-in tilt shift feature. It's used by most professionals as their secondary when they don't feel like lugging around the SLR. You can also fit it with full-size lenses if you get the adapter."
I hope this answered most of your question. Happy Picture taking!

-------------------------------------------------
I would like to introduce you to a new sponsor here at MyShtub.

The Bold Edge is a design school, offering cutting-edge design related courses in various fields such as web design, graphic design, video production and photography. We offer class both from our studio in Brooklyn and from the comfort of your location worldwide through our live online classrooms and our non-internet based option.
What stands out about us at The Bold Edge is as our slogan "always cutting edge" We offer technology advanced course that can be taken from wherever you are located worldwide, from the comfort of your home, office, semonary, the beach, the jungle, well you get the picture!. We have courses that are given live via our web classroom or we also have non-internet based options as well to suit each persons need!
Learn from the comfort of your home, office or school worldwide.
Learn the most cutting edge Web Design techniques all at our low affordable price!
Join a Live class in a frum environment, see and hear your instructor live. Experience a complete hands-on experience, with constant instructor guidance and feedback
Become a part of an international classroom experience. Interact and speak to fellow minded creative students located worldwide. A side bonus, develop lasting friendships.
Learn all about design for the web including: Web design principles, Color theory, Typography, Photoshop for web, Fireworks, Jquery, HTML, CSS, Dreamweaver. Then learn how to design and set up WordPress based sites as well as eCommerce sites. Plus, gain knowledge in design for mobile devices, Social media marketing, SEO, Email marketing design and more.
Complete the course ready to work in the field with a portfolio of 3 complete websites:

1. Informational website

2. WordPress based website and

3. Fully featured E-commerce website.

Job search assistance, internships and mentoring after course completion.

This to me looks amazing, and i would have loved to learn Photoshop in the comfort of my home instead of a University classroom, but unfortunately in my days things like this were not available.
---------------------------------
If you would like to advertise or be a sponsor on MyShtub please contact me at myshtub@gmail.com or click here for more info.

Yud Shevat!!!!

Today is Yud Shevat the previous Rebbe's Yahrtzeit and the day the Lubavitcher Rebbe became our Rebbe. All day Ive been thinking what can i do, what more does the Rebbe and Hashem want from me, but then my day got busy i had diapers to change, kids to dress. I had meals to serve and others to prepare for Shabbos. All day we sung the Rebbe's niggunim, we gave tzedakah and read the twelve pesukim. We went shopping, and we wore our very best clothes and felt a little overdressed loading grocery's in our van. In the end I decided that this is giving the Rebbe nachas, this is what a chassid and a mother is. We think of our Rebbe when driving, and teach our kids ,the next generation, to look at this humble tzadik as their guide, and that to me is Yud Shvat. Good Shabbos everyone.

My little brown town

Here i am sitting in my home that always has a chill to it no matter how high the heat is on. Its 60 degrees out today, but my house still feels like it is thirty. I know this has more to do with needing to replace the windows and its age, old homes are just drafty.

I'm wishing i was sitting on the beach right now or drinking coffee on my parents deck looking out to the ocean. I think my trip was too much of a weather tease and it made coming home harder then i thought it would be.

Our plane landed home and it had snowed, but the snow was melting to a brown slush. The air was tight and cold and there was not one ounce of green, just brown, and i started to cry.


I wish the weather did not dominate my life as much as it did, but when you come from a mild climate where the weather is either warm or hot, it is hard to adjust.

(my brother)
When i got to California i got sick. My doctor says my weakened immune system can not handle the airplane.

(Dovie took this picture)
My last plane trip to Florida resulted in a deep rooted cough that kept me up most nights, and lasted for 2 months. This time i got a sinus infection to top all previous sinus infections i regularly get, and strep throat.

I have actually never had strep throat as an adult and let me tell you this is no take some antibiotics and it will get better, this is a full fledged infection. I'm talking bone pain, ear pain, mouth sores, and a locked jaw. I ate nothing and cried to my husband on the phone that this was the most painful thing in the world, and i wasn't exaggerating.

It took two different antibiotics a trip to the emergency room and some steroids to bring this bad boy down, and i honestly i just stared feeling back to myself yesterday. Now here is the strange part, ok not so strange, but i would do it all again just to have warm weather and the beach.

(my mom)

(and my dad)
My mom commented that i was such a trooper through my medical ordeal, but palm trees and ocean sunsets can bring the trooper out in anyone. Dead trees and brown slushy snow/mud just don't bring on trooper mentality.
It brings on a "i'm not leaving my bed and you cant make me" mentality. So what is this girl to do?


( my niece Chloe, is she not stunning?)
I wish i had an answer, i wish my husband could work in the west coast, but he cant. I wish i could adapt, but i have tried and so far i cant. I just feel like if I'm going to deal with infections, with illness, with a low immune system, why cant it be on the beach?


( her big sister Sophia, again gorgeous, i do not see these girls enough!)
Is that asking for too much? I know it sounds a little spoiled.
I need to make a choice. I can accept where i live. I can accept that the people here are wonderful and the community is my support system that i wouldn't know what to do without. I can accept that i have made lifelong friends here that i love with all my heart. I also need to daven, i need Hashem to help me with this choice to accept, because i have been put here in this little brown town for a reason.


I often wonder if i would appreciate the ocean, the desert, the weather as much without this life lesson. I know spring will be here soon and the green will work its way back in. I also know that forever is a long time and living here now doesn't mean forever.


Well i guess i could always buy a summer home, i know i know the spoiled coming out again.

---------------------------(this line is me changing the subject)----------------
I was wondering if you could all take a minute and vote for my son's school. This school is close to my heart because i was one of the founders and had a vision for a cheder here in Baltimore. That little basement beginnings they talk about in the video, well that was my basement. I left the school when i had Rozie and chose to devote my time and energy to her needs, but it still very close to my heart. Thanks!
Check it out. I just rated [How parents help our Cheder grow!] on the Day School Video Academy Awards. #JDSVA #jed21